Deuteronomy 30 vs 19 holds such an important reminder to me. In those few seconds when I awaken at 3am, there is a choice I have to make. Do I wake up and spend time with the Lord? Or do I sleep?
“Now choose life, so that you and your children may live and that you may love the Lord your God, listen to His Voice and hold fast to Him.”
Step one is to just choose life. To get up. To come through to my quiet place and boil the kettle and get comfy. (My quiet place also happens to be the laundry room. With the help of a very skeptical husband, I squished my little dresser into the room to provide a place for me to pray. A war room of my own.)
Once I have chosen to get up and come and sit here, there is just so much that the Lord promises me… That I may live! Oh how I want to live… Not just to breathe. Not just to exist… But for Him to grab my hand and pull me so fast that the wind is blowing on my cheeks. For Him to hold me tight when we stop running so that I can feel His heartbeat. I want to walk hand in hand so that I can feel the warmth of His hand in mine… Oh what a promise for me to be able to LIVE when I choose Him.
And then the rest of the verse seems to deliver the best promise of all. That only when I choose Him, will I really learn to love Him. Only as I spend time with Him will I discover who He is and fall deeper and deeper in love… I long to have that same feeling towards God that I have towards my husband. In the evenings when we were courting we used to talk so much neither of us wanted to leave… Even now we often sit in the lounge chatting about our day until one of us notices that we are sitting in the darkness as at some point in the conversation daytime has slipped away into night.
And after I love Him, when I am walking in fellowship with Him, it is then that I will hear Him. The promise of listening to His Voice fills me wish such security. The command to hold fast to Him as one of my babies holds fast to me. Such trust because this loving parent will never let me fall.